Behind the Scenes: Finding Those Relatable Moments

Artists Insight 

I asked these talented photographers a simple question - 

"What do self portraits mean to you or why do you like creating them?" 

Click and hover over the images below to read their answers. I absolutely loved reading all their responses. 

Selfie Stigma 

The "selfie." This relatively new term has dominated and ingrained itself into some of our daily lives. Heck, it's even in the dictionary now. Many blame social media for the instant-gratification generation that's on the rise, but would the average person still be taking the same amount of images of themselves without all these social networking opportunities available today?

Yeah, probably not. Why? Because the average person wouldn't care to spend the time doing something that's not going to get some sort of response (we're artists, so it's a bit different). It's been proven we crave attention on some level, good or bad. For some, it's a lot more than others. So where did this negative stigma looming over people who photograph themselves come from, even though it's been happening since we've been able to permanently capture light? 

First off, we need to learn though that taking photographs of ourselves isn't bad or an always narcissistic thing to do. We're now for the first time ever, living in an era where it's not too common to know someone without a camera or some sort of device with a camera on it. Yes, there are always going to be a plethora of iconic "selfies" containing duck lips, tongues, peace signs, and background toilets. It seems as if it's required for the average profile pic for the past decade or so. Please accept that fact and let us move on. They're not going anywhere, but don't let that faux pas selfie saturation fix you into thinking self portraits contain no value or thought. As an artist, you should know better than that. You're not basic.  

My Story

I started learning about photography right around the time MySpace was really blowing up. That's when I got my first camera, a small little point-and-shoot. I remember being obsessed with updating my profile and making everything look cool and flashy. Copying and pasting so many HTML codes and all that jazz. I started seeing some creative and out of the ordinary profile photos popping up here and there, and that's what really made me want start experimenting with self portraiture for the first time. In high school this continued and I started to teach myself about photoshop and photo manipulation as much as I could. Soon, my interests pursuing photography as something I wanted to make a career out of after graduating became my goal.

In college, I gained so much more insight into the photography world than I had ever imagined. Learning about light, color theory, the business side of things, and art history - one of my favorite subjects. I love seeing how the art world has reacted to the different social situations throughout the times, and you know what - artists have always been creating self portraits, way before photography was a thing. This really isn't anything new people, it's just that in some ways it's a simpler process now.   

Discovering Conceptual Photography 

It was in a digital illustration class I had in college where I discovered conceptual fine art photography. I absolutely fell in love with the ability to tell stories through photographs. Before I became a photographer, I thought I was going to be a writer. So merging these two creative mediums I loved just made so much sense to me.

One of the very first creative self portraits I created was an idea that struck me while thrifting and a local shop here in Philly. I saw this briefcase sitting there and immediately saw this image in my mind and shot it that weekend in a nearby field.

I started discovering all these amazing photographers who were creating amazing self portraits on Flickr. Some of these artists I'm so grateful to know now and have become really good friends with. This really motivated me and inspired me to start working in this new style. I've always been in love with having the ability to fly. Something I always wished I could do when I was a kid; so naturally levitation was a concept I really wanted to start off shooting. It's fantastic when you find passion for something and start putting 100% into something you love.

What Self Portraiture Means to Me

With creating self portraits, I really love the fact that it's something that's almost 100% me (sometimes you need an assistant, it happens). When I started, I hid my face from the camera because I wasn't a model and also because it's something I still believe helps viewers relate a little more with the faceless character in my photographs. But, soon I stopped caring that I wasn't a model. I stopped thinking I had to resemble someone that fits into the standards of attractiveness based on celebrity ideals of the Hollywood elite. People aren't perfect beings. I can't change the way I appear.

After I started shooting self portraits, I got over my insecurities about showing my face in my photos. Whenever I'm in front of the camera, the sense of the character I'm portraying in my photographs starts to take ahold of me. I've stopped thinking I'm shooting a photo of myself - I more so go along with the thought process of saying I'm acting as a character for a story I want to tell.

Sometimes, I want to be in the image because the concept I'm shooting holds some personal ties to me. When I shoot a conceptual self portrait, it's really my way of expressing feelings I'm going through. That creative process starting taking over and it helps me with what I'm dealing with. I'm a really big believer in writing down feelings I'm going through. It helps by giving me a direction to start finding clarity and helps me build on ideas for photos to create. Expressing yourself through photography and have people relate to the visual narratives you've created is a really good feeling.  

The Value

Taking a photograph of yourself or with friends for those scrapbook moments is always a great way to help solidify memories. Taking a gander at those photographs are always nice to have for later on, but self portraiture can be so much more than that and when you discover the world of conceptual imagery, it's hard come back from. When you're able to create something that provokes thought and has depth to it, finding another feeling is hard to compare to. 
 

Creating A Fine Art Self Portrait:
My Process 

1. BUILDING

There are two main reasons why I shoot my conceptual photos in large panoramas. The first, shooting around F2.5 and panning the camera across the scene creates a wonderful and natural blur effect, something I really like my photographs to have - a nice soft element. The second, is because my camera only has 12.8 megapixels and I really like details and printing really large. Compositing all this elements together creates a higher resolution image overall. 

2. COMPOSITION

After piecing all the pieces together, sometimes go through using the automated photoshop feature, or stitching everything together by hand (really depends on the situation and what I was shooting). Then I decide on my final composition for my image. I do this after because I always make sure to shoot more than I really need in the environment so i have more room to play with cropping later. 

3. BASE LAYER

Once I have my final composition, I sharpen and soften the image and correct any errors before going into any heavy editing. Here I also desaturated and lightened the blues in the image. 

4. LIGHTING

I start off working with lighting first before color. I think it helps me edit later with richer colors. At this point I'm working with selective color and curve adjustments in Photoshop to create and add more dynamic lighting to the photo. I've added a soft glow to the sky and subtly darkened the background to make the main subject of the photo pop. 

5. COLOR

Now I start playing with color. I mainly use the selective color and curves adjustments here too, with a little added vibrance. I've added warmth to the image here, making the photo seem like it was shot later in the afternoon.  

6. TEXTURE 

I've always been a fan of textures For the longest time I was afraid to use them in my images because I really wasn't sure what to ever do with them. It's very easy to create something too distracting when you add textures to an image. You have to find a right balance of tones and texture strength. I usually lower the opacity down and play with different blending modes, sometimes added a curves adjustment to the layer. Now it looks like there could be clouds in the distance, and it's giving the image a little bit of a vintage feel. 

7. FINISHING TOUCHES / FINAL IMAGE 

Once I've added all the textures to an image, I go and really just play around with the same adjustments and tweak some of the levels around to help the image pop and get the right colors I feel fit the image well. I'll keep playing around until I'm happy with how the photograph looks. I'll always save my document and look at it a day or two later with fresh eyes, to really make sure I'm happy with all the editing I've done. 

Behind the Scenes: Don't Look Down

Standing below, behind the broken wall up on the hill behind me. Photo Credit: Tom Newfordge 

Standing below, behind the broken wall up on the hill behind me. Photo Credit: Tom Newfordge 

"I have faults and barriers and I'm not okay with that, but at the end of the day - I'm human. I can accept that notion whole-heartedly OR I can take responsibility of who I am and work towards positive goals and genuinely be a better version of myself. Not a perfect one, because no one's perfect; but a better one." 

I wrote this quote to myself a few weeks before starting the new year. It's something I really fell in love with and something I've been working hard on doing. When you live your life portraying yourself as the cookie-cutter version of something that's been expected of you, it puts you in a rather uncomfortable position. You start overthinking the simple things and reevaluate if what you're doing is going to make everyone around you happy - you care too much of what everyone else thinks. In doing so, you may reach this point -  a point where everyone's content with you, except for yourself. 

The more you go out of your way to change yourself to make others happy, the more you'll look at yourself in the mirror and start hating the facade you've built and the uncomfortable situations it's put you in. If you're living to make everyone happy around you everyday, you're losing out on your own happiness, and you build these ugly invisible walls. You sacrifice your well being for those around you and you momentarily start acting like another person, and simply put, that's just not fair. You're caught in the scenario, "Damned if I do, damned if I don't." 

I'm learning and growing. There's always room in life for these elemental things. You can not and should not stop them. What's the point in going through life thinking you're done? You've learned and seen it all. That's just a little boring for my taste, if you ask me.

One of the things I've been learning recently is that you absolutely CANNOT make everyone happy, as much and as hard as you try. At the end of the day, you have to be happy with yourself and the decisions you've made for YOURSELF. Only then should you consider letting in any exterior worries into your life. You can't put too much on your plate. It's your life. Learn to take some damn control of it. 

I've been opening up to myself in recent months, more so than I have in a really long time, and you know what, it feels good. It feels good to be genuine and to take down those fronts and bare all for the world to see. Sure, it's scary, it's new, but what's life without transition and growth? Starting that new chapter everyone's always talking about. 

That's where I feel like I am with life right now. Working through the tough bits and looking forward to those positive goals I want to reach for myself. A lot of what I've been through recently represented itself more in this image now, then from when I originally shot it. Fear of the challenge. Don't look down, just go with it. The height shouldn't defer you from where you want to go, only your preparedness. The unraveling rope representing my control of the situation. 

You can only learn to take each day as it comes, because that's how they're going to come, and you have to face that. We can't control time as much as we'd like to. As long as you're living for yourself, you're living. 

Behind the Scenes of one of Robert Cornelius's newest images for his "Dust to Dust" series. Click this image to his blog to see the final piece! Photo Credit: Tom Newfordge 

Behind the Scenes of one of Robert Cornelius's newest images for his "Dust to Dust" series. Click this image to his blog to see the final piece! Photo Credit: Tom Newfordge 

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When life's got you down and you have a spare few hours, spending time with friends can make all the difference, helping you get your mind off things for amazing moments of clarity. Right after New Year's, our friend Rob (of Robert Cornelius Photography) invited us up to his studio for a photo day. We usually get together once a month, and just do awesome creative things all day, helping each other out in the process. 

Driving up, the most amazing fog rolled in and lasted for the majority of the day. This is pretty rare for our area, so we took the opportunity to go to the nearby park, before spending the day in the studio. Oh yeah, and I got into a small car accident too. After brunch, we drove to the park and broke off into little groups, just doing our own things. I was itching to shoot. Tom (of Newfordgestudios) and I strolled down this strange path down the hill, below the rubble above, and scouted for possible spots to shoot. 

I kept getting drawn back to this shattered wall on top of the hill. It told a story to me, and I wanted to create something that resonated that feeling in my head. I've had this huge rope for almost two years now, and I've never done anything with it. Always carrying up to meet ups and whatnot. I've seen it used by others in some pretty killer images, but I finally felt like this was the right opportunity to use it. Tom was my human remote for me on this shoot, just to help wrap things up more quickly to make our way back to the studio. 

We had a great day in the studio, drooling over all endless props, equipment, and the awesome brownies Rob's wife made for us. Delicious, gooey, melt-your-heart brownies. Everyone took turns executing different ideas. Personally, I've never been a studio guy. Even when I was in school taking my Advanced Lighting course, I lugged all the equipment and lighting with me and shot on location. That didn't stop me from helping though and I modeled for Rob in this amazing concept for a series he's been working on. 

It's hard to tell me otherwise, but photographer friends are simply some of the best to have, or at least the ones I've come across. We get to set out on day adventures, bounce ideas and talk about common interests, get ourselves in some of the funniest and strangest situations, and still be able to produce some really amazing images. That creative bond and circle of friends is something I hope all people can find. 

 

Behind the Scenes: Awaiting Adventure & The Beginning of A Getaway

Photo Credit - Liz Bukoski

Photo Credit - Liz Bukoski

Back in October, I had a wonderful week at a Flickr meetup hosted by my friend Val (of Valerie Kasinski Photography), at her cabin in upstate New York. My friend Rob (of Robert Cornelius Photography) and I carpooled up together and arrived our first night a little late. We said our hellos to new friends and gave hugs, but it was clear everyone was exhausted from the day. We discussed plans for the morning and I looked through my brain (notebook), and didn't hesitate to pass out for the next day's adventure. 

After waking up and chowing down on some grub, went to the garage to play a bit of show and tell. Along with Rob and I, everyone had brought with them a grab assortment of vintage clothing and costumes, swords, and other props. The hard part was deciding what to pack up and load into the back of the car. We didn't have far to go though. There was this amazing location not even a mile down by the side of the road.

We parked on the side of the road and looked up at the massive pine trees sprawling up to the sky. It was sort of a damp and misty day, but a great overcast day is nothing to get upset over. The lighting was beautiful and the coverage from the tree tops shaded us from any harsh light. At first, walking into the forest was reallllly dark, but then (not even a few minutes inside), our eyes adjusted so well to the low light. It was the weirdest thing, but still pretty cool. We unloaded the cars of the cameras, props and cases of clothes, and set up home base. It was a pretty awesome sight to see (from a photographer's standpoint at least. To others, we usually look crazy, haha). 

After that was all said and done, I looked down on the plethora of materials in front of me and my brain just started getting overloaded with where to start. Before getting too well ahead of myself, I decided to explore a bit more of the area and check out any potential locations to set up a shot at. 

At the back edge of the forest, I came across this random chair just sitting near a fallen tree. The chair looked pretty cool by itself, but the location was pretty killer too. Val swung by with an awesome concept I helped participate in, and I grabbed Liz (of Liz Bukowski Photography) and Emma (of Emma Johnson Photography) to help assist the concept I was gearing up to do. Val so kindly modeled for me and I loved how her hair contrasted with all of the yellows and greens. 

As I set up my tripod, I kept on noticing little things I wanted to change, and the shoot was quickly evolving into something way more interesting. I starting using more of the environment in the shot, grabbing red leafs to throw in around all the greenery and then I start setting all these ferns around the base of Val's dress. The back of the chair she was sitting in had this back wicker mesh to it. I began poking in a few ferns in there and I immediately was loving the effect. I had to ask Val to sit very still for the duration of the setup and while I was shooting to keep everything propped up nicely and she was a trooper! 

When everything was finally set and ready, I had Liz and Emma set off smoke bombs behind the fallen tree behind Val. Once they set off, it was go time and the way the smoke crawled though the scene was awing. 

Photo Credit - Rob Cornelius 

Photo Credit - Rob Cornelius 

Around lunch time, we quickly grew hungry from running around with excitement and a lot of HOOPLAH's. While around half the group went back to the cabin, I set up to do a self portrait with dozens of these old rusted opened cans of beans laying all over the ground. There was just something there that had a story to tell and I got that itch to shoot. 

When the others arrived back, I ate a PB&J and learned Alex (of Alex Currie Media) was only going to be with us for the day, so instead of shooting a self portrait, I decided to use this talented guy for my concept while I had the chance - who wants to look at my face anyway, haha. 

For this shot, I got down as low as I could with my tripod. For my main shot, I framed Alex as far into the frame as possible without getting poked by another tree behind me. Halfway through panning the expanding shots I had to stand up super quick for a short break - my legs were killing me being so low, looking at my live-view on the back of my camera. 

When we wrapped up for the day, we collected all of our belongings from the damp woods and went back to the cabin. I was tired at this point and was glad to rest up a bit and kick my legs up. Out of the blue, a few others came inside and said a thick fog was rolling in. This intrigued me to say the least. 

As much as I really didn't want to get up and start moving around again, it's been the longest time since I've seen an awesome fog. There never seems to be any in Philly, it's pretty rare. So I jumped at the opportunity. 

We went up the street and into a field nearby. Before our eyes, the sun started setting and the color changed the fog into the most amazing purple/magenta hue I've ever seen naturally. Alex went out and posed for a few of us and I snapped this photo with my phone believe it or not. The quality really impressed me with the beefed up camera on the iPhone 6. This amazing color only lasted 5 minutes at most before it was gone as quickly as it came. I'm glad I got off that chair, haha.